About Our Journey
"I never really gave much thought to the realities of caring for a parent."
I think I had this fantasy that having my mom nearby would be all about fun, reconnecting and making up for the years we couldn’t spend together when I was in my 20s, 30s, and 40s. I imagined us going to the movies (which we do!), having mani/pedis, and just enjoying each other's company, like we’d never been apart. I pictured it as a time to relax, laugh, and make memories, but the reality has been a bit more complicated than I expected.
Our journey into elder care unexpectedly began in early 2024 when Mom's husband (not my father, but her beloved second husband of many years, who lived to an incredible 103) passed away. Mom and I had previously talked about the possibility that if he were to pass before her, she would move closer to me and get her own place. I wasn't trying to rush her, but I was definitely concerned about her potential loneliness after caring for him at home for the last few years.
Just a couple of weeks after his passing, I drove the two hours to visit her. When I walked in, she seemed unusually agitated and even a bit annoyed with me. It wasn't typical, but I just chalked it up to her having a lot on her mind. About twenty minutes later, after we finally sat down, I gently asked if everything was alright. That's when her words started to not make sense. Having recently taken a CPR/First Aid class with my teenager, the signs of a stroke were fresh in my mind. Mom suffered a TIA, a mini stroke which led to the beginning of our story.